Thursday, March 24, 2011


this is still bizarre.

i sat down yesterday to make a list of all the things i need to do before i go. it went like this:

*pack up stuff
*put stuff in car
*drive to utah


I eventually added oil change and having someone check my tires and fluids,, i really have nothing else to do. which makes me feel like i'm wasting my time. but then...but then i'll be gone, friends! i can hardly wait to begin my second utah chapter, but every now and then it hits what i'm leaving behind here, and then i'm just all kinds of mixed emotions.

roommate tabby is wonderful. she has a happiness box. it is full of years and years of magazine clippings and other such things. she gave it to me to look through and take pretty things. it is a very inspiring and wonderful thing.


i really really do so much and....can't you all just come with me?

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

a little bit in shock

it may be wiser to wait a day or two to make this entry. but who wants to be wise all the time?

....bad question.

i want to write this now. when i'm still feeling it. whatever IT is. a lot of things....

i was fired from my job today. my employment was terminated. i was let go. however you wish to euphemize it, it was done. the reasons for this are vague and not altogether clear to me. in fact, i am baffled. i was shocked. i still am.

but whatever the reasons are, they are unimportant. because this is what is supposed to happen. i felt that the moment he told me i was no longer an employee there. this sense of: this is what's supposed to happen. this is the end of the portland chapter (for now at least). i'm coming back to utah.

there was definitely a period of hysteria. i certainly cried my eyes out for a good ten minutes. but good friends and eternal perspective have filled me with a sense of overwhelming peace. this is exactly what is supposed to happen. nothing went wrong. it's all part of this crazy and wonderful plan.

God works in THE MOST mysterious ways. and man, i love Him. This is a great adventure. It has been, and it will continue to be. I'm utterly excited for the next chapter of it.

i really do love my life. more with each day that passes. i am so so blessed to have had the experiences i have, but mostly i am so blessed to know the people i know. you are incredible. i feel so loved and supported all around. Heavenly Father loves each of us, and he has marvelous things in store. i love life! be excited. it's going to be epic.

Saturday, March 5, 2011



i've neglected you....

i guess i must be busy with better things. yup.

so, are YOU?